After getting all of Pope Francis’s luggage loaded into the limo at the airport, the driver notices the Pope is still standing on the curb. ‘Excuse me, Your Holiness,’ says the driver, ‘Would you please take your seat so we can leave?’ ‘Well, to tell you the truth,’ says the Pope,’they never let me drive at the Vatican, and I’d really like to drive today.’ “I’m sorry, Your Holiness, but I cannot let you do that. I’d lose my job! ” protests the driver, ‘Who’s going to tell?’ asks the Pope with a smile.
Reluctantly, the driver gets into the back as the Pope climbs in behind the wheel. The driver quickly regrets his decision when, after exiting the airport, the Pontiff floors it, accelerating the limo to 130 mph. “Please slow down, Your Holiness” pleads the worried driver, but the Pope keeps the pedal to the metal until they hear sirens.
The Pope pulls over and rolls down the window as the cop approaches. The cop takes one look at him, goes back to his motorcycle, and gets on the radio. ‘I need to talk to the Chief’, he says to the dispatcher. The Chief gets on the radio and the cop tells him that he’s stopped a limo going 130 mph. ‘So bust him,’ says the Chief.
‘I don’t think we want to do that. He’s really important,’ said the cop. The Chief exclaimed, ‘All the more reason!’ ‘No, I mean really important,’ said the cop with a bit of persistence. The Chief then asked, ‘Who do you have there, the mayor?’ Cop: ‘Bigger.’ Chief: ‘ A senator?’ Cop: ‘Bigger.’ Chief: ‘The President?’ Cop: ‘Bigger.’ ‘Well,’ said the Chief, ‘who is it?’ Cop: ‘I think it’s GOD! The Chief is even more puzzled and curious, ‘What makes you think it’s God?’ Cop: ‘His chauffeur is the Pope!’
Good one.
Excellent
Good
Hahaha
Did you know that priests can kiss nuns as long as they don’t get into the habit…….
A young woman goes to her doctor’s office, afraid of the strange development on the inside of her thighs … a green spot on the inside of each.
“They won’t wash off, they won’t scrape off and they seem to be getting worse.” The doctor assures her he’ll get to the bottom of the problem, and tells her not to worry until the tests come back.
A few days later, the woman’s phone rings. Much to her relief, it’s her doctor. She immediately begs to know what’s causing the spots. The doctor says, “You’re perfectly healthy – – there’s no problem. But I’m wondering, is your boyfriend a Harley guy?” The woman stammers,”Why, yes, but how did you know?”
“Tell him his earrings aren’t real gold.”
A Syrian is explaining Easter to an Iranian:
Its really very simply see.
These Italian police grab this Jew for creating a disturbance in Palestine, based on a complaint made by some important people.
The Judge decides he doesn’t want to get on the wrong side of “important people” so he lets the general public decide his guilt by an election.
The important people rig the vote for the death penalty.
So the police set up an Italian execution, after which the victim is laid out up in a cave. The victims friends come by to see him but he just up and walked out.
So ever since, one day a year his friends come by to see him get up and walk out of the cave.
NOW…. If he sees his shadow….
That’s a good one. Thumbs up!
the jokes on this site are almost always very good, to fantastic. keep them coming!!