Near Fredericksburg , Texas , where there is a large German-speaking population, a farmer walking down a country road with a large pistol notices a man drinking from his pond with his hand.
The farmer shouted: ‘Trink das wasser nicht. Die kuhen haben dahin gesheissen.’
(Which means: ‘Don’t drink the water, the cows have s*** in it.’)
The man shouted back: ‘I’m from mexico and just up here campaigning for Obama’s health care plan, I can’t understand you. Please speak in English or Spanish
The farmer replied: ‘Use two hands, you’ll get more.
An old prospector shuffled into the town of El Indio , Texas leading an old tired mule. The old man headed straight for the only saloon in town, to clear his parched throat. He walked up to the saloon and tied his old mule to the hitch rail. As he stood there, brushing some of the dust from his face and clothes, a young gunslinger stepped out of the saloon with a gun in one hand and a bottle of whiskey in the other.
The young gunslinger looked at the old man and laughed, saying, “Hey old man, have you ever danced?” The old man looked up at the gunslinger and said, “No, I never did dance… never really wanted to.”
A crowd had gathered as the gunslinger grinned and said, “Well, you old fool, you’re gonna’ dance now,” and started shooting at the old man’s feet. The old prospector, not wanting to get a toe blown off, started hopping around like a flea on a hot skillet. Everybody was laughing, fit to be tied.
When his last bullet had been fired, the young gunslinger, still laughing, holstered his gun and turned around to go back into the saloon. The old man turned to his pack mule, pulled out a double-barreled shotgun, and cocked both hammers. The loud clicks carried clearly through the desert air.
The crowd stopped laughing immediately. The young gunslinger heard the sounds too, and he turned around very slowly. The silence was almost deafening. The crowd watched as the young gunman stared at the old timer and the large gaping holes of those twin barrels.
The barrels of the shotgun never wavered in the old man’s hands, as he quietly said, “Son, have you ever kissed a mule’s ass?”
The gunslinger swallowed hard and said, “No sir….. but… I’ve always wanted to.”
There are two lessons for us all here:
Don’t waste ammunition.
Don’t mess with old people.
Must belong to Ted Nugent…
Does that point towards Mexico?
I would say “OCC’s new build for Smith & Wesson”, but it’s too nice of a job…..
You can damn well bet a Republican owns this! BRAVO!
Over & Out,
Jeff
I get it!!!
You load Mexicans into the chamber & shoot ’em BACK!
One at at time-of course, sending a message…..
Choppertom,
You can shoot two at a time if they are small!
Over & Out,
Jeff
Here you go Jeff.
Speaking German in Texas
Near Fredericksburg , Texas , where there is a large German-speaking population, a farmer walking down a country road with a large pistol notices a man drinking from his pond with his hand.
The farmer shouted: ‘Trink das wasser nicht. Die kuhen haben dahin gesheissen.’
(Which means: ‘Don’t drink the water, the cows have s*** in it.’)
The man shouted back: ‘I’m from mexico and just up here campaigning for Obama’s health care plan, I can’t understand you. Please speak in English or Spanish
The farmer replied: ‘Use two hands, you’ll get more.
fuji,
Think I know that farmer!
Over & Out,
Jeff
Here you go Fuji,
Have You Ever Danced?
An old prospector shuffled into the town of El Indio , Texas leading an old tired mule. The old man headed straight for the only saloon in town, to clear his parched throat. He walked up to the saloon and tied his old mule to the hitch rail. As he stood there, brushing some of the dust from his face and clothes, a young gunslinger stepped out of the saloon with a gun in one hand and a bottle of whiskey in the other.
The young gunslinger looked at the old man and laughed, saying, “Hey old man, have you ever danced?” The old man looked up at the gunslinger and said, “No, I never did dance… never really wanted to.”
A crowd had gathered as the gunslinger grinned and said, “Well, you old fool, you’re gonna’ dance now,” and started shooting at the old man’s feet. The old prospector, not wanting to get a toe blown off, started hopping around like a flea on a hot skillet. Everybody was laughing, fit to be tied.
When his last bullet had been fired, the young gunslinger, still laughing, holstered his gun and turned around to go back into the saloon. The old man turned to his pack mule, pulled out a double-barreled shotgun, and cocked both hammers. The loud clicks carried clearly through the desert air.
The crowd stopped laughing immediately. The young gunslinger heard the sounds too, and he turned around very slowly. The silence was almost deafening. The crowd watched as the young gunman stared at the old timer and the large gaping holes of those twin barrels.
The barrels of the shotgun never wavered in the old man’s hands, as he quietly said, “Son, have you ever kissed a mule’s ass?”
The gunslinger swallowed hard and said, “No sir….. but… I’ve always wanted to.”
There are two lessons for us all here:
Don’t waste ammunition.
Don’t mess with old people.
I just love a story with a happy ending!
Over & Out,
Jeff
Jeff
Amen for the old guys.
Jeff,
The Liberal version is in NYC, outside the UN, with a knot in the barrel.
-nicker-
Wow….what can i say…..just point towards terror…
Hey! Isn’t this the original “Have Gun Will Travel?”