Joke Of The Week

cyril-huze-joke44“What do you want to be when you grow up?”

Little Johnny says: “I wanna hit the powerball and be a billionaire, go to the most expensive clubs, find me the finest whore on the planet, give her a Ferrari worth over a million bucks, an apartment in Copacabana, a mansion in Paris, a jet to travel throughout Europe, and an Infinite Visa Card, and bang her three times a day in the most exotic places on earth”.

The teacher, shocked, and not knowing what to do with this horrible response from little Johnny, decides not to acknowledge what he said and simply tries to continue with the lesson …..

“And how about you, Sarah?” “I wanna be Johnny’s whore”.

Zipper's

4 Responses to “Joke Of The Week”


  1. 1 USAYGO Feb 20th, 2014 at 1:24 pm

    Finally, a blonde joke with some Canadian content….
    As a North Bay trucker stops for a red light on Hwy.11, a
    Blonde catches up.. She jumps out of her car, runs up to his
    Truck, and knocks on the door. The trucker lowers the
    Window, and she says, “Hi, my name is Heather, and you
    Are losing some of your load!”

    The trucker ignores her and proceeds down the street.
    When the truck stops for another red light, the girl
    Catches up again. She jumps out of her car runs up and
    Knocks on the door. Again, the trucker lowers the window.

    As if they’ve never spoken, the blonde says brightly,
    “Hi, my name is Heather, and you are
    Losing some of your load!”

    Shaking his head, the trucker ignores her again and
    Continues down the street. At the third red light, the same
    Thing happens again.

    All out of breath, the blonde gets out of her car, runs up,
    Knocks on the truck door.
    The trucker lowers the window.. Again she says, “Hi, my
    Name is Heather, and you are
    Losing some of your load!”

    When the light turns green the trucker revs up and races to
    The next light When he stops this time, he hurriedly gets
    Out of the truck, and runs back to the blonde. He knocks on
    Her window, and as she lowers it, he says,…………..

    “Hi, my name is Kevin, it’s winter in CANADA , and I’m driving the SALT TRUCK……….”

  2. 2 fuji Feb 20th, 2014 at 7:42 pm

    Rectum stretcher.

    Women ‘flying’ down the road passed over a bridge only to find a cop with a radar gun waiting

    Cop pulled her over. ‘What’s your hurry?’

    Lady ‘I’m late for work.

    Cop ‘what do you do?

    Lady I’m a rectum stretcher.

    COP And just what does a rectum stretcher do?

    LADY I start by inserting one finger, then two fingers, then with my whole hand in.

    I work from side to side until I can get both hands in, and then I slowly but surely stretch it, until it’s about 6 feet wide.’

    Cop just what the hell do you do with a 6 foot asshole? ‘ he asked.

    Lady You give him a radar gun and park him behind a bridge…’

  3. 3 Olive Oil Feb 21st, 2014 at 5:37 pm

    This man in a Ford Granada pulls up next to a guy in a Rolls Royce at
    a stop sign. Their windows are open and he yells at the guy in the
    Rolls: “Hey, you got a telephone in there?” The guy in the Rolls says,
    “Yes, of course I do.” “I got one too… see?” “Uh, huh, yes, that’s
    very nice.” Then the man in the Granada says, “You got a fax machine?”
    “Why, actually, yes, I do.” “I do too! See? It’s right here!”
    “Uh-huh.” The light is just about to turn green and the guy in the
    Granada says, “So, do YOU have a double bed in back there?” And the
    guy in the Rolls says, “NO! Do you?” “Yep, got my double bed right in
    back here — see?!” The light turns and the man in the Granada takes
    off. Well, the guy in the Rolls is not about to be one-upped, so he
    goes immediately to a customizing shop and orders them to put a double
    bed in back of his car. About two weeks later, the job is finally done
    and he picks up his car and drives all over town looking for the
    Granada. He finally finds it parked alongside the road so he pulls his
    Rolls up next to it. The windows on the Granada are all fogged up and
    he feels a little awkward about it, but he gets out of his newly
    modified Rolls and taps on the foggy window of the Granada. The man in
    the Granada finally opens the window a crack and peeks out. The guy in
    the Rolls says, “Hey. Remember me?” “Yeah, yeah, I remember you.
    What’s up?” “Check this out — I got a double bed installed in my
    Rolls.” And the man in the Granada says, “YOU GOT ME OUT OF THE SHOWER
    TO TELL ME THAT?!”

  4. 4 Knucklehead on a Panhead Feb 21st, 2014 at 11:32 pm

    It’s the first day of the first grade elementary school when the teacher tells the class that everyone will get up in front of the class and tell everyone what their father does for a living and then spell it. For those who are correct, they will receive milk and cookies as a reward.

    The teacher then points to Martha, a cute little white girl and say’s….Martha, would you please get up and tell us what your father does and then spell it?

    Martha gets up to the front of the class and says, My father is a welder….W-E-L-D-E-R….And if he were here today, he would show us how to melt two pieces of steel together! The teacher then says….Very good Martha! You get your milk and cookies!

    The teacher then points at Clement, a white boy with a mullet and says, Clem, would you tell the class what your father does and spell it? Clement then gets up in front of the class and says…My dad is a roughneck, R-O-U-G-H-N-E-C-K and if he were here today, he would show you how to drill a hole in the ground in search of oil! The teacher says…Very good Clem! You get milk and cookies!

    The teacher then looked around and points at Tyrone, a little colored boy and asks him if he’s like to tell the class what his dad does for a living?

    Tyrone gets up in front of the class and says….My dad is a elictrec…….at mid sentence the teacher inter-rupts Tyrone and says…..NO…NO….NO…Tyrone!!! that’s NOT the correct way of spelling ELECTRICIAN! I’m sorry Tyrone…But NO cookies and milk for you!

    About his time, little Cleatus is waving, jumping up and down and just about to go berzerk by frantically waving his hands!!! The teacher reluctantly points at Cleatus and says…Alright alright Cleatus! You may get up and tell us what your dad does for a living!

    ole Cleatus, just as proud as a peacock, stolls up to the front of the class and says…..My dad is a bookie….B-O-O-K-I-E….AND…..If he were here today, he would have given you ten to one odds that Tyrone wouldn’t have been able to spell electrician!!!

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