Joke Of The Week

cyril-huze-joke44No English dictionary has been able to adequately explain the clear difference between these two words “COMPLETE” versus “FINISHED”


In a recently held linguistic competition held in London and attended by supposedly the best in the world, Samdar Balgobin, a Guyanese man, was the clear winner with a standing ovation.


The final question was:  “How do you explain the difference between COMPLETE and FINISHED in a way that is easy to understand? Some people say there is NO difference between COMPLETE and FINISHED”


Here is his astute answer. 
  
”When you marry the right woman, you are COMPLETE.  When you marry the wrong woman, you are FINISHED. And when the right one catches you with the wrong one, you are COMPLETELY FINISHED!!!

Zipper's

3 Responses to “Joke Of The Week”


  1. 1 Magnet Man Mar 22nd, 2014 at 8:15 am

    HA, ha, such clarity, I LOVE it!

  2. 2 Olive Oil Mar 22nd, 2014 at 6:13 pm

    A blonde city girl named Sue marries a Colorado rancher. One morning, on
    his way out to check on the cows, the rancher said to Sue, “The insemination
    man is coming over to impregnate one of our cows today, so I drove a nail
    into the 2 by 4 just above where the cow’s stall is in the barn. “Please
    show him where the cow is when he gets here, OK?”

    The rancher left for the fields. After a while, the artificial
    insemination man arrived and knocked on the front door. “I came to
    inseminate the cow,” he said.

    Sue took him down to the barn. They walk along the row of cows, and
    when Sue saw the nail, she told him, “This is the one right here.”

    The man, assuming he was dealing with an airhead blonde asked, “Tell
    me, lady, ’cause I’m dying to know. “how would YOU know that this is the
    right cow to be bred?”

    “That’s simple.” she said. “By the nail that’s over its stall, she
    explained very confidently.

    Laughing rudely at her, the man said, “And what, pray tell, is the
    nail for?”

    The blonde turned to walk away and said sweetly over her shoulder, “I
    guess it’s to hang your pants on,” she replied.

  3. 3 knucklehead on a panhead Mar 24th, 2014 at 1:57 pm

    It’s a bright sunny day on the ranch when rancher Clyde walks over to the bull pen where his prize bulls congregate.

    He says….Well boys….I bought another bull and I must warn you…..He’s the biggest, most ornery bull I’ve ever seen, so the three of you might want to discuss how many cows and which cows you want to give the “new bull”.

    The first bull, having been on the ranch 10 years and having seniority over the other two bulls….Says….I’m NOT giving any “new bull” any of my cows! Followed up by the second bull. who had been on the ranch for 5 years, saying he wasn’t going to give this “new bull” ANY of his cows!

    The third bull, who was the “rookie” out of the three was about to give his two cents worth where the “new bull” was concerned……

    When……

    All the the sudden, a huge Mack semi-truck rolled into the coral and was SHAKING….RATTLING…BOUNCING UP AND DOWN AND SIDE TO SIDE WITH FEROCIOUS AND EAR SPLITTING SOUNDS SIMILAR TO TWO GRIZZLY BEARS IN A LIFE AND DEATH STRUGGLE!!!!

    This appearance of the truck certainly got the attention of the three bulls standing in the coral!

    The truck driver reluctantly and cautiously walks to the back of the Mack semi and opens the back door QUICKLY and then RUNS to the safety of his cab!

    To the three bulls literal astonishment, out STRUTS the BIGGEST, BADDEST, MOST MUSCULAR BULL they had EVER seen in their life!

    The old bull of ten years says in a passive tone…..Well….He is one BIG S.O.B. and I suppose I could give him a few of my cows!

    The second bull, having been on the ranch for five years reluctantly says….Yeah…..He is one BIG BULL!!! I suppose I could give him a few of my cows!!!

    Then….

    The “rookie bull” starts CLAWING AT THE GROUND, THROWING DIRT EVERYWHERE AND BASICALLY CHALLENGING THE “NEW BULL” TO A FIGHT!!!

    The old bull and the five year old bull yell at the rookie bull and say…

    WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!?!?!

    LOOK AT THE SIZE OF HIM!!!

    HE WILL CHEW YOU UP AND SPIT YOU OUT!!!

    The Rookie bull then turns around to look at the other two bulls, while still clawing the ground and says……..

    I just want him to KNOW that I’m a BULL!!!!

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