Politically Correct Season Greetings

For those looking for politically correct Season Greetings, an example of what you could write to your family, friends, colleagues and neighbors.

Greetings All,

Sorry for the delay…our Legal Department just approved the following Holiday Greeting:

Merry Christmas, Happy Solstice, Happy Hanukkah, Happy Kwanza, Happy Holidays, Happy New Year, et al,

Please accept with no obligation, implied or implicit my best wishes for an environmentally conscious, socially responsible, low stress, non-addictive, gender neutral, celebration of the winter solstice holiday(tm), practiced within the most enjoyable traditions of the religious persuasion of your choice, or secular practices of your choice, with respect for the religious/secular persuasions and/or traditions of others, or their choice not to practice religious or secular traditions at all . . . and a fiscally successful, personally fulfilling, and medically uncomplicated recognition of the onset of the generally accepted calendar year 2012, but not without due respect for the calendars of choice of other cultures whose contributions to society have helped make America great, (not to imply that the United States Of America is necessarily greater than any other country or is the only “AMERICA” in the western hemisphere), and without regard to the race, creed, color, age, physical ability, religious faith, choice of computer platform, or sexual orientation of the wishes.

By accepting this greeting, you are accepting these terms: This greeting is subject to clarification or withdrawal. It is freely transferable with no alteration to the original greeting. It implies no promise by the wisher to actually implement any of the wishes for her/himself or others, and is void where prohibited by law, and is revocable at the sole discretion of the wisher. This wish is warranted to perform as expected within the usual application of good tidings for a period of one year, or until the issuance of a subsequent holiday greeting, whichever comes first, and warranty is limited to replacement of this wish or issuance of a new wish at the sole discretion of the wisher.

Have a Safe and Happy Holidays Season.

Zipper's

31 Responses to “Politically Correct Season Greetings”


  1. 1 Knucklehead Dec 22nd, 2011 at 9:15 am

    Merry Christmas Cyril!

  2. 2 Fluke Dec 22nd, 2011 at 9:58 am

    Two booboos, America isn’t a country, it is a continent with 32 separate counties and various dependencies on it. The USA is a country.

    If you are going to be ultra PC, go the whole hog.

    But yeah, happy holidays peeps, even those living in the past in a country that doesn’t actually exist.

  3. 3 Kroeter Dec 22nd, 2011 at 12:02 pm

    Don’t discriminate or you’ll get to litigate.

    Merry Chri$tma$

  4. 4 Luis Dec 22nd, 2011 at 12:08 pm

    America isn’t a continent Fluke. North America is a continent. South America is a continent as well. I’f you’re going to be PC be geographically correct 🙂

  5. 5 Larry R Dec 22nd, 2011 at 12:44 pm

    Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year to all! Love and respect to all!

  6. 6 CafeSportyTC Dec 22nd, 2011 at 12:52 pm

    I cant….. oh….bloody hell. I wish…… nevermind it doesnt make a difference

  7. 7 The troll Dec 22nd, 2011 at 1:35 pm

    The nice thing about being a real biker is that you can tell all those politically correct types to go to hell

  8. 8 Woody Dec 22nd, 2011 at 2:27 pm

    Happy Festivus!!!!!
    (and best wishes for a great new year and miles of safe riding to all)

  9. 9 bigitch Dec 22nd, 2011 at 3:21 pm

    if your gonna be PC then stop saying booboo that is something children say. use mistake, mistaken, or incorrect.

    and to stay PC…bah humbug!

  10. 10 zyon Dec 22nd, 2011 at 3:46 pm

    Well, I for one would like to wish everyone a blessed Yule…. and for those who celebrate Christmas… Merry Christmas.

  11. 11 Fluke Dec 22nd, 2011 at 4:22 pm

    actually America is a continent, north and south are directions on it

    But Cyril edited his copy and paste seasons greetings form 5 years ago and my response too, so it doesn’t really make sense anymore.

  12. 12 Captain John T. Awesome Dec 22nd, 2011 at 4:31 pm

    You know the only thing more annoying than people assuming I celebrate a festival dedicated to the great spaghetti monster in the sky, is people whining about political correctness as if it’s a real problem. Boo friggin hoo. Not everybody is a christian or wants to be included in a christian festival. Get over it.

  13. 13 GetYoHeadOutofYoAss Dec 22nd, 2011 at 5:48 pm

    Captain Wonderful or Captain Awestruck or whatever.

    You state, in part: “You know the only thing more annoying than people assuming I celebrate a festival dedicated to the great spaghetti monster in the sky, is people whining about political correctness as if it’s a real problem.”

    In writing this statement you assume that someone actually knows that your miserable ass even exists and you further assume that someone (even if they knew your miserable ass did exist and then knowing what a sorry person you seem to be) would remotely care what your opinion of this “Christian Festival” is or is not.

    Therefore, and in conclusion, please allow me to be the first to state that during the holiday season you have permission and are even encouraged to go f&%k yourself and have a MERRY CHRISTMAS ASS WIPE.

    Thank you for your time.

  14. 14 fuji Dec 22nd, 2011 at 7:25 pm

    Websters definition of a fluke.

    A ” wad ” that should have been shot on the wall instead of in a box. LOL

    “America the Beautiful ” is a beautiful song and to whom/region does it pertain to ?

    Merry Christmas America.

    Damn just when I was in a good mood

    Semper Fi

  15. 15 Boss Hawg Dec 22nd, 2011 at 8:56 pm

    Merry Christmas to all.

  16. 16 Mithion Dec 22nd, 2011 at 10:22 pm

    Happy whatever everyone!!!

  17. 17 BobS Dec 22nd, 2011 at 10:28 pm

    Jesus came to me in a dream last night and wished me a happy holiday season.

  18. 18 Nobody Dec 23rd, 2011 at 1:12 am

    Merry what ever you celebrate, and if you don’t celebrate anything around this time of year, crack open a beer and laugh at the idiots running each over in parking lots and nitwits flaming each other over the interwebs.

    Sláinte!

  19. 19 Rogue Dec 23rd, 2011 at 7:31 am

    To me it is still Merry Christmas and if that offends you just add yourself to the list of people that I have offended for some reason.
    I have learned that i am not going to make everyone happy all of the time So I do it because it makes me happy and hopefully some others.
    I hope that people have a better year in 2012 even if 2011 was really good to you.
    I think I will find my Santa Hat, put it on and go for a ride on my motorcycle yelling Ho, Ho, Ho and hope it does not offend some female.
    I just had to add that so some one would have something to comment on.

  20. 20 GetReal Dec 23rd, 2011 at 8:28 am

    Captain John T. Kiss A Fat Ass
    Take your non believing ass to hell….Merry Christmas and don’t you dare celebrate it.

    BobS
    Jesus ain’t never came to you…go get you some of those ABS brakes…

    GetYoHeadOutofYoAss
    Just who the hell do you think you are?

  21. 21 rags Dec 23rd, 2011 at 8:31 am

    merry xmas to all

  22. 22 GetReal Dec 23rd, 2011 at 8:44 am

    MERRY CHRISTMAS to all who believe in Jolly Ole Saint Nick and the spirit of Christmas.

    To those non believers….don’t celebrate and go back to running your check cashing centers, skid row motels and liquor stores or better yet take your asses outta here because you are not a biker to begin with. Now Bitch about that!

  23. 23 Calif Phil Dec 23rd, 2011 at 8:50 am

    Merry Christmas to all.

  24. 24 mid-north-kustomz Dec 23rd, 2011 at 9:19 am

    merry xmas 2 all, safe ridn, and best wishes, 2 boss hawg, i have left u a kwik message, on the bbc blog. thanx. tony gee.

  25. 25 Lisa Horney Dec 23rd, 2011 at 9:36 am

    Merry Christmas to all and may we all have a prosperous New Year.
    Love this blog, thanks Cyril

  26. 26 Kirk Perry Dec 23rd, 2011 at 9:37 am

    If Santa had sleds like ours…… he wouldn’t need Reindeer !

  27. 27 Jeff Nicklus Dec 23rd, 2011 at 11:19 am

    MERRY CHRISTMAS AND A HAPPY NEW YEARS TO ALL!

    Over & Out,

    Jeff

  28. 28 EzJ Dec 23rd, 2011 at 12:28 pm

    It would have been cool to be riding your motorcycle on Christmas Eve in the Holy Land by the light of that bright star that seemed to appear from out of nowhere over 2000 years ago. You’re riding along on the outskirts of Jerusalem and out of the corner of your watchful biker eye you see 3 dudes dressed in the finery ancient mystical kings from the Far East wear and their camel rides are loaded with gear for a cross country putt and royally adorned with exotic tack and Duane Ballard custom saddles. So you lay off your throttle and ride up to ask these road dogs, “Hey brothers…what’s up?” “How come you guys are all dressed up and traveling on such a cold night?” These dudes have excited serious looks on their faces and they point at the star and invite you to follow them. So, you say to yourself, I got nothing better to do and like most of us bikers looking for new adventures, you decide to take these dudes up on their offer. Out of respect you keep your scooter in 2nd ‘cause there is no rush & don’t want your pipes to spook these righteous brothers’ rides. You cruise through Jerusalem and ride up a hill or two and as you get to the outskirts of town you end up in a small suburb called Bethlehem. You notice a bunch of shepherd brothers with their sheep dogs guarding their flocks near a rundown looking roadhouse with a detached stable in even worse condition. Looks like the place is packed. There is even a small family getting ready to bed down in the stable. The 3 royal looking dudes park their camel-rides just outside the entrance to the stable. You just figure they need to check their rides in first and will be taking shelter in the road house for the night. It’s late and you ‘kinda wonder why guys who could afford 5 star digs would want to stop here, but maybe they need to keep a low profile because the ATF is after them. Also, for now, that star seems to have stopped moving across the sky and is directly over the stable. “Trippy!” you exclaim to yourself. “Feels like something major is up, but I’m beat. People are cool here. Guess I’ll stop here for the night, too.” One of the shepherd brothers waves you over to their small campfire and offers you a drink. So, you park your scoot, pull your bedroll off your sissy bar and over you go to accept the brother’s hospitality. That star looks closer and brighter now. You can’t take your eyes of it. You thank the shepherd brother for his hospitality and you’re in the middle of a swig when all of a sudden a bunch of Heaven’s Angels come flying across the sky and the shepherds, their dogs and all the sheep and me are scared sh_ _ less. The biggest ‘Angel is lit up near as bright as the unusual star and he tells everyone “Chill! And don’t be afraid!” and he says, “Brothers…I got good news…etc.” You are digging on this scene & patting yourself on the back for doing what we bikers do – taking a road to a different place ’cause it sounded like a cool adventure…but you never realized that the road you took this particular night would lead you to witness the birth of the King of Kings and all the bummers you ever had or will have will be wiped clean and the King that was born that night will invite you to live with him in heaven forever no charge. My favorite sentence: “It’s taken care of….” Merry Christmas y’all. & Happy Birthday to my King.

  29. 29 Olive Oil Dec 23rd, 2011 at 1:40 pm

    Happy Chanukau & Merry Christmas to all.

  30. 30 BobS Dec 23rd, 2011 at 5:11 pm

    To Nobody: here’s a pint of Guiness to you!
    To Get Real: Jesus said to say hi and he loves you too.

  31. 31 GetReal Dec 23rd, 2011 at 5:12 pm

    BobS I know Jesus loves me…it’s you he is worried about.

    Merry Christmas to all the real bikers here.

Comments are currently closed.
Crusher
S&S
S&S
Barnett
S&S

Subscribe

Socialize

Facebook Google+ Twitter