2008 Financial Terms Revised.

CEO –Chief Embezzlement Officer. CFO– Corporate Fraud Officer. BULL MARKET — A random market movement causing an investor to mistake himself for a financial genius. BEAR MARKET — A 6 to 18 month period when the kids get no allowance, the wife gets no jewelry, and the husband gets no sex. VALUE INVESTING — The art of buying low and selling lower. P/E RATIO — The percentage of investors wetting their pants as the market keeps crashing. BROKER — What my broker has made me. STANDARD & POOR — Your life in a nutshell. STOCK ANALYST — Idiot who just downgraded your stock. STOCK SPLIT — When your ex-wife and her lawyer split your assets equally between themselves. FINANCIAL PLANNER — A guy whose phone has been disconnected. MARKET CORRECTION — The day after you buy stocks. CASH FLOW — The movement your money makes as it disappears down the toilet. INSTITUTIONAL INVESTOR — Past year investor who’s now locked up in a nuthouse. PROFIT — An archaic word no longer in use. (Thanks to The Big Picture)

7 Responses to “2008 Financial Terms Revised.”

  1. 1 harry Nov 22nd, 2008 at 12:05 pm

    funny stuff, especially the “split stock”.

  2. 2 harry Nov 22nd, 2008 at 12:07 pm

    excuse me, stock split, my bad…

  3. 3 KT Nov 22nd, 2008 at 12:26 pm

    That may keep me laughing all day long!!!
    Thanks Cyril

  4. 4 burnout Nov 22nd, 2008 at 4:02 pm

    I will repeat these terms often during the coming week, Thanks again Mr Huze! peace

  5. 5 madpuppy Nov 23rd, 2008 at 11:54 am

    HAHAHAHAHA, that is great Cyril !

  6. 6 Patrick R. Nov 24th, 2008 at 10:40 pm

    Might be funny, but we are bailing these F___ers out! We are all paying for the carelesness of the finicial giants. They should go down with their ships! Who’s bailing me out? I am ready to go broke myself! I am not asking anyone for a handout~ KUDOS CITIGROUP!! You got us too!

  7. 7 Jeff Nicklus Nov 25th, 2008 at 3:57 pm

    As sad of a state as the motorcycle industry is in maybe I should be headed to DC so I can get some of this Bail Out Money! Nah …… Fuck ’em I will do this myself without their handouts!

    Over & Out,


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Cyril Huze